Love never ends

Love woke me in the morning,
Stung me with the pin prick of heartache
As I lay defenseless and open-
Not yet able to tell if this was a dream.
The foggy mornings you wrapped your arms around me tightly
I thought it was just one morning of forever
Instead of a handful of numbered days.

The story replayed and chased me 

through my sheets still slick with sweat.

Hunted me down with a longing I am yet too young to be haunted by. 

Spun in my mind til I was dizzy and mad with stars.
I wonder when I will be my own again.
For I am no longer yours,
You are no longer mine,
We loved eachother for a brief blink of time.

I wonder when you will stop showing up 

between a strangers cologne on a crowded sidewalk 

and the last restaurant we ever shared a meal in togther.
Because you are no longer mine.
And if I am no longer yours 

Why are all my insides scattered like a toddlers puzzle?
Why didn't you put my pieces back neatly and in their box on the shelf?
  where did those small pieces go to die?
I've looked through my possessions, under my couch, and through my closets
I still haven't found them yet.
I stopped painting a year after knowing you,
I said nothing about everything a year after I left,
I forgot how to dress myself,
Regressed.
Left in such a hurry with my possession stuffed in garbage bags 

that I didn't bring all the fragments 

No. No.
I stitched myself togther but the wound hasn't closed.
I'm not alone or lonely.
With all the offers of company.
Just missing
But not missed.

You never think of me,
I know you never did.
It would be so much easier to hate you.
Instead of working around the pain of loss
Like a blanket whose tightly knit edges my over worried fingers have worn down.

When does it stop hurting,
And when does it just stop?